I was recently on a trip to the South Pacific. The trip started in Hawaii, included several stops in some VERY tropical, VERY desolate islands. Procedurally speaking, these were some very difficult places to fly to. But who cares about that? Let's get down to the good stuff.
We arrived at the hotel and agreed to lobby in 10 minutes. I went upstairs, unpacked, put on some board shorts and a t-shirt and headed to the bar. The bartender made me a fantastic Mai-Tai and I had 2 more. Soon, the crew arrived... They're always late, and joined me for cocktails. We prodded the bartender for more info as our night began to take shape. I guess he took one look at us knew what we were looking for. He recommended a joint called Shenanigans, of all places. We had one more drink a piece and headed out. As our destination was only a few blocks away, we opted to walk. We passed by small souvenir shops selling the normal bullshit, a few decent-looking western-themed restaurants intertwined by "massage parlors" with the girls standing on the street soliciting passersby, in what could only be described as Sai Pan's pitiful offering of a red light district. We trekked onward.
The next morning, I hit the beach early and soon found myself talking to 2 Austrian girls. They invited me out with them that night but since we were leaving that afternoon, we settled on being Facebook friends. I'll catch up with them in Europe. I love my life!!
We landed in Sai Pan on a Saturday morning and had 30 hours on the ground. Plenty of time to get into some good trouble. After unloading the baggage, seeing the passengers off and cleaning the plane, our flight attendant fixed us all a cocktail and we headed toward customs. The customs officer was an American, as Sai Pan is a US territory. Who knew? He was very helpful in recommending some fun places that shouldn't be missed during our short visit. He was obviously bored with living in this place.
View from my room in Sai Pan
We arrived at the hotel and agreed to lobby in 10 minutes. I went upstairs, unpacked, put on some board shorts and a t-shirt and headed to the bar. The bartender made me a fantastic Mai-Tai and I had 2 more. Soon, the crew arrived... They're always late, and joined me for cocktails. We prodded the bartender for more info as our night began to take shape. I guess he took one look at us knew what we were looking for. He recommended a joint called Shenanigans, of all places. We had one more drink a piece and headed out. As our destination was only a few blocks away, we opted to walk. We passed by small souvenir shops selling the normal bullshit, a few decent-looking western-themed restaurants intertwined by "massage parlors" with the girls standing on the street soliciting passersby, in what could only be described as Sai Pan's pitiful offering of a red light district. We trekked onward.
We had Shenanigans in sight and human Froggered the busy street to the other side. We dealt with the door guy and stepped inside the Devil's playground. We were quickly approached by several local whores and escorted to a table. The best in the house. We passed several tables of locals who sneered at our elite status. We were seated, guy-girl-guy-girl and I quickly had a rough hand in my pants, grabbing my unimpressed cock. The drinks started to flow. After an hour or so, an aggressive little Asian slut came over and grabbed my hand and pulled me onstage. She was helped by a large stripper and my hands were tightly tied around the pole as the smaller one undid my shorts and pulled them down around my ankles. I was sans underwear. There was a roaring applause as a blindfold was secured around my head. The next thing I know, my ass was being slapped so fucking hard that I had a bruise for 4 days. I wanted to kill that bitch, but nonetheless, my friends got good pictures and I mustered a smile and a pretty good tip!
We continued to get shitfaced and were given our choice as to what lady we would like to take home. I couldn't agree on a price and went home empty handed. Can't say the same for my other crew members. My flight attendant and I were left to make it back to the hotel on our own. We stopped in an ice cream shop were she was accosted by a group of drunken Japanese guys. They thought she was Liv Tyler. She's a shoe in for her. Her complete Doppleganger. We took some pictures with the guys, got our ice cream and split to the hotel.
The next morning, I hit the beach early and soon found myself talking to 2 Austrian girls. They invited me out with them that night but since we were leaving that afternoon, we settled on being Facebook friends. I'll catch up with them in Europe. I love my life!!
We lobbied that afternoon to go to the airport. Our next stop... The Philippines. Get ready for this!
We landed at Subic Bay, Philippines, after dropping the passengers off in Manila. The plane was clean so all we had to do was fix a drink for the road and head to the hotel. The place we showed up at was a complete shit hole. We refused to stay there and drove around to find better accommodations, which was really pissing me off. We had serious partying to do on a truncated time schedule. We were only here for 3 days. We found a slightly better shit hole and tossed our shit in the room and headed out. We went to a couple bars and then some guy told us we needed to go to a place called Olongopo. After a small warning as to what we were getting ourselves into by our cab driver, we were soon on our way to Olongopo. After about 20 minutes we rolled into what can only be described as Vegas' evil little brother, without all the gambling. There were "bars" called The Wet Spot, Rascals and AngelWitch. All from a bygone era when Clark Air Force Base at Subic Bay was full of U.S. servicemen looking to get their dicks wet with a nice little 16-year old Philippino. The base has been closed for a while, but no one told the working girls. We decided to eat and have a few drinks before really getting into it.
We stepped into a recommended restaurant. It was busy and in the back they were having a kid's dance competition and the place was packed with families. This seemed strange, considering the "neighborhood." Nevertheless, we enjoyed the show. Something strange that we all started to notice was the alarmingly high number of middle aged and older men with young, YOUNG women on their arms. It was just accepted. Even in this family setting. These gross fuckers were everywhere. Sadly, I was about to join their ranks.
We had been SCUBA diving all over the South Pacific and at this point in the trip, I was addicted. I had gotten my certification in college and had never dove since. Before we got into any trouble, I wanted to find out when and where I needed to be for the next day's dive. We found a dive shop next door to a really cool beachside hotel. I secured a spot on the boat for the next day and we collectively agreed that we needed to leave the roach motel we were currently in and relocate to this chic, Australian-owned beachside spot. They wanted $80US for their nicest room with a view of the bay... Sold!
We had another drink at the hotel bar and made our way in a tricycle (a motorized 3-wheeler with a bench seat on the back). We decided on a place called Rascal's, the newest of the seemingly endless selection of whore houses. We walked into a scene of about 12 girls dancing on stage that was reminiscent of a boat hull. All the girls had bikinis on, some were in costumes and all were attractive. I noticed a large net above the stage filled with ping pong balls but was immediately distracted by our waitress, a young Philippino that we soon nicknamed, "Yum Yum." There was a jug of ping pong balls on our table, rekindling my curiosity. The madam came over and introduced herself, a hottie in her early 40's named, Rose. I've always been attracted to older women. Rose explained to us the "rules" of the house while Yum Yum fixed us up with drinks. I queried her about the God damned ping pong balls and she explained that for every ball you throw up on stage, the girls get the equivalent of a quarter. I had to try. I watched 4 girls scramble for the ball I threw until one small girl finally fought it away from a taller girl. This was going to be fun. What about the net over the stage, I asked? Ohhh!! That one has a hundred balls and it costs $35US to pull the cord. I ran over and pulled it and a hundred ping pong balls fell onto the stage and every working girl in the joint went absolutely fucking nuts. They were chasing balls all over the damned place, under the bar, behind tables, behind the DJ booth. Fucking everywhere! It was the funniest sight you've ever seen in your life. That cord got pulled about 10 more times that night. We couldn't get enough of it. Before we knew it, every girl in the place was at our table. It got to the point that men would come in the place and leave because they couldn't get any attention. It was fucking awesome. We owned that place. And by the time we got our bill, we should have just bought it. It came out to the equivalent of $1200US. Those sons of bitches didn't tell us that the drinks for the girls were 3 times the price of our drinks. We were buying drinks for everyone, pulling the cord, throwing ping pong balls and paying bar fines, which I will soon explain. It was getting late and we were all horny. The way it works in this part of the world is that you have to pay what is called the "bar fine" in order to take the girls out of the bar. Then you negotiate whatever you want with the girl on your own. The bar fine is $35US per girl and a guy I met told me that the girls will never ask for anything. I didn't believe him. Nevertheless, I grabbed Rose, the mamasan, who assured me she wasn't on the "menu" and a crazy little slut named Angel. My crew each grabbed the girls of their liking and my flight attendant ended up with the bartender, a young man named Jeff, who had been taking great care of us all night. It was about 2 in the morning and the crew wanted to go to the club next door. I passed and got into a cab for the hotel with Rose and Angel. After all, I had a dive boat to catch in the morning. Within about 30 seconds, my shorts were around my ankles and Angel was giving me a blowjob while my hand was far down Rose's pants, playing with her clit. This continued for the 20-minute ride back to the hotel.
I sheepishly hustled through the lobby of the hotel with the girls in tow and up to my room. Our cloths were quickly off and we all decided to take a shower together. It was great! Hands were all over each other, dicks were in mouths, fingers in pussies, you name it. We got out, toweled off, I grabbed a rubber and we fucked for the next hour or so. These girls were great. They "fought" over me and we did just about every position known to man, my favorite being fucking Angel from behind while Rose licked my balls.
Angel
8:00 AM rolled around pretty quickly and I called the front desk for a cab. I sent the girls down ahead of me to save myself some embarrassment while I quickly packed in order to change hotels. I jumped into the cab the girls were waiting in and headed back toward Olongopo. My plan was to drop them back off at Rascal's, drop my bags off at our new hotel and then head to the dive shop. We arrived at Rascal's and I said goodbye to the girls and they got out. It was true! They didn't ask for a dime. I rolled down the window and called them back to the cab. I gave them each $40US and they seemed very pleased. Not bad, I thought. $150US for 2 girls for the night. I hardly felt like I'd paid for sex at all. It was great!!
I quickly dropped my bags at the hotel and made my way to the dive shop and checked in. I met another American and a goofy Canadian with more camera gear than you can imagine. I mean this guy had more shit hanging off of him than Superman. It was just ridiculous. I was hungover/still drunk and James, the American, quickly spotted it and asked how I felt. I felt so so but told him I felt great. He was cool, about my same age and we both made fun of the Canadian. We gathered our gear and made our way to the boat for the 15 minute journey to the dive site.
I got my shit on... slowly, and made my way to edge of the boat to listen to a brief, which I barely paid attention to. Soon, I found myself in the water, which was surprisingly cool and made me feel a little better. As we descended, my head began to ache. Soon we were diving around a wreck from WWII seeing some pretty cool fish and sites when I suddenly started feeling nauseas. We were at 30 meters. In my very limited diving experience, I'd never been told what to do if I needed to throw up. Do I take out my regulator? My first thought was what happened last time I threw up. I remembered immediately gasping for air after each heave. I would have to time it perfectly to keep from ingesting water. Should I throw up in my regulator? Would it get clogged if I did? I felt like I was fucked. I could feel myself starting to sweat. I kept swallowing my saliva to try and hold it back. My eyes began to water. As the group continued to explorer the wreck, I maintained my buoyancy and kept as still as I could... This didn't help. I started moving around a little and this did help... Slightly. I was freaking the fuck out. I was on the verge of swimming straight to the surface. I knew this was a bad idea, especially from 30 meters. As I was contemplating my limited options, our guide came back and motioned if everything was ok. I grabbed my stomach, which sure as fuck didn't help. He motioned for me to head up and I complied. We ascended slowly and made a 3-minute safety stop at around 15 feet. The whole time my stomach was wrenching. I made it about a minute and half before I filled my BC up with air and shot to the surface. The second I felt the air, I immediately projectile vomited. It was awesome! I looked like the fountains of the Bellagio. We got back on the boat, I drank some water and immediately felt like a million bucks. We did one more dive that morning that went great and headed back to shore to "debrief" (have a beer). I caught a lot of shit from the other guys but I didn't give a shit. I was proud of myself for maintaining my composure in a completely unfamiliar situation. Oh yeah. I learned that you can throw up right into your regulator with no repercussions. The chunks will just purge out the sides. Wish I had known.
I walked over to our new hotel and met the crew at the lobby bar to swap stories of the previous night. They were very impressed that I had made the dive boat. When I put my mind to something, there's very little that will stop me from accomplishment. They were less impressed when I told them about throwing up. I went up to my room and enjoyed the view for a while before taking a nap for a few hours. We did, after all, have to do it all over again that night.
We made friends with this cute little 22-year old Philippino who was our waitress at the bar. She was getting off and we invited her to dinner with us, which she obliged. We went to a restaurant within walking distance of the hotel and had an unremarkable meal. The whole time, I was hitting on Rhea, our new friend, and she was eating it up. After dinner was over, about 11, Rhea said she had to get home. We held hands as I walked her back to the hotel and I told the crew that I'd meet up with them at Rascal's. We got back to the hotel and I invited Rhea up to the room. We climbed the 3 flights to my room and were having sex within about 15 minutes. She was a real sport! Very sweet and adventurous. Afterwards, she got dressed and said she REALLY had to get home. I asked what her hurry was and she said she had a 2-year old to get home to. Jesus, I thought. She left and I went and met the crew. They were back at it, pulling that God damned cord every 30 minutes and having those bitches run wild for those fucking ping pong balls. I was exhausted. Rose wouldn't have any of it and was all over me. Angel had the night off. I pushed Rose away and ordered a drink. After my drink, I decided to head back to the hotel. Rose asked me if I wanted her to come over and I did. I told her I'd leave a key for her at the front desk. She showed up about 2:30 and we had sex again. She left around 3:30. I didn't tip her.
One thing I can say about the Philippinos is that they are unequivocally the nicest people on Earth. This is saying a lot for me. I'm from Texas and thought we for sure had the nicest people in the world. Everyone in The Philippines addresses you as sir or ma'am and always have a smile on their faces. They never ask for anything and as much as I felt like I exploited them, I still have a lot of respect for them. We lobbied the next day around noon and nearly everyone that we had met during that leg of the trip met us in the lobby to say goodbye. Almost all of them had some sort of gift to give us. Rhea gave me a keychain and Rose had baked me some pandesal bread, the greatest, sweetest bread you have ever tasted. The other girls that the crew had hooked up with gave them each gifts as well. Jeff gave my flight attendant some roses. It was a really great and touching way to end an awesome trip. We made our way to the airport, prepped the plane and waited for our passengers. We stopped at Guam on the way back to Hawaii for fuel and were in Honolulu 10 hours later.
We had another drink at the hotel bar and made our way in a tricycle (a motorized 3-wheeler with a bench seat on the back). We decided on a place called Rascal's, the newest of the seemingly endless selection of whore houses. We walked into a scene of about 12 girls dancing on stage that was reminiscent of a boat hull. All the girls had bikinis on, some were in costumes and all were attractive. I noticed a large net above the stage filled with ping pong balls but was immediately distracted by our waitress, a young Philippino that we soon nicknamed, "Yum Yum." There was a jug of ping pong balls on our table, rekindling my curiosity. The madam came over and introduced herself, a hottie in her early 40's named, Rose. I've always been attracted to older women. Rose explained to us the "rules" of the house while Yum Yum fixed us up with drinks. I queried her about the God damned ping pong balls and she explained that for every ball you throw up on stage, the girls get the equivalent of a quarter. I had to try. I watched 4 girls scramble for the ball I threw until one small girl finally fought it away from a taller girl. This was going to be fun. What about the net over the stage, I asked? Ohhh!! That one has a hundred balls and it costs $35US to pull the cord. I ran over and pulled it and a hundred ping pong balls fell onto the stage and every working girl in the joint went absolutely fucking nuts. They were chasing balls all over the damned place, under the bar, behind tables, behind the DJ booth. Fucking everywhere! It was the funniest sight you've ever seen in your life. That cord got pulled about 10 more times that night. We couldn't get enough of it. Before we knew it, every girl in the place was at our table. It got to the point that men would come in the place and leave because they couldn't get any attention. It was fucking awesome. We owned that place. And by the time we got our bill, we should have just bought it. It came out to the equivalent of $1200US. Those sons of bitches didn't tell us that the drinks for the girls were 3 times the price of our drinks. We were buying drinks for everyone, pulling the cord, throwing ping pong balls and paying bar fines, which I will soon explain. It was getting late and we were all horny. The way it works in this part of the world is that you have to pay what is called the "bar fine" in order to take the girls out of the bar. Then you negotiate whatever you want with the girl on your own. The bar fine is $35US per girl and a guy I met told me that the girls will never ask for anything. I didn't believe him. Nevertheless, I grabbed Rose, the mamasan, who assured me she wasn't on the "menu" and a crazy little slut named Angel. My crew each grabbed the girls of their liking and my flight attendant ended up with the bartender, a young man named Jeff, who had been taking great care of us all night. It was about 2 in the morning and the crew wanted to go to the club next door. I passed and got into a cab for the hotel with Rose and Angel. After all, I had a dive boat to catch in the morning. Within about 30 seconds, my shorts were around my ankles and Angel was giving me a blowjob while my hand was far down Rose's pants, playing with her clit. This continued for the 20-minute ride back to the hotel.
I sheepishly hustled through the lobby of the hotel with the girls in tow and up to my room. Our cloths were quickly off and we all decided to take a shower together. It was great! Hands were all over each other, dicks were in mouths, fingers in pussies, you name it. We got out, toweled off, I grabbed a rubber and we fucked for the next hour or so. These girls were great. They "fought" over me and we did just about every position known to man, my favorite being fucking Angel from behind while Rose licked my balls.
8:00 AM rolled around pretty quickly and I called the front desk for a cab. I sent the girls down ahead of me to save myself some embarrassment while I quickly packed in order to change hotels. I jumped into the cab the girls were waiting in and headed back toward Olongopo. My plan was to drop them back off at Rascal's, drop my bags off at our new hotel and then head to the dive shop. We arrived at Rascal's and I said goodbye to the girls and they got out. It was true! They didn't ask for a dime. I rolled down the window and called them back to the cab. I gave them each $40US and they seemed very pleased. Not bad, I thought. $150US for 2 girls for the night. I hardly felt like I'd paid for sex at all. It was great!!
I quickly dropped my bags at the hotel and made my way to the dive shop and checked in. I met another American and a goofy Canadian with more camera gear than you can imagine. I mean this guy had more shit hanging off of him than Superman. It was just ridiculous. I was hungover/still drunk and James, the American, quickly spotted it and asked how I felt. I felt so so but told him I felt great. He was cool, about my same age and we both made fun of the Canadian. We gathered our gear and made our way to the boat for the 15 minute journey to the dive site.
I got my shit on... slowly, and made my way to edge of the boat to listen to a brief, which I barely paid attention to. Soon, I found myself in the water, which was surprisingly cool and made me feel a little better. As we descended, my head began to ache. Soon we were diving around a wreck from WWII seeing some pretty cool fish and sites when I suddenly started feeling nauseas. We were at 30 meters. In my very limited diving experience, I'd never been told what to do if I needed to throw up. Do I take out my regulator? My first thought was what happened last time I threw up. I remembered immediately gasping for air after each heave. I would have to time it perfectly to keep from ingesting water. Should I throw up in my regulator? Would it get clogged if I did? I felt like I was fucked. I could feel myself starting to sweat. I kept swallowing my saliva to try and hold it back. My eyes began to water. As the group continued to explorer the wreck, I maintained my buoyancy and kept as still as I could... This didn't help. I started moving around a little and this did help... Slightly. I was freaking the fuck out. I was on the verge of swimming straight to the surface. I knew this was a bad idea, especially from 30 meters. As I was contemplating my limited options, our guide came back and motioned if everything was ok. I grabbed my stomach, which sure as fuck didn't help. He motioned for me to head up and I complied. We ascended slowly and made a 3-minute safety stop at around 15 feet. The whole time my stomach was wrenching. I made it about a minute and half before I filled my BC up with air and shot to the surface. The second I felt the air, I immediately projectile vomited. It was awesome! I looked like the fountains of the Bellagio. We got back on the boat, I drank some water and immediately felt like a million bucks. We did one more dive that morning that went great and headed back to shore to "debrief" (have a beer). I caught a lot of shit from the other guys but I didn't give a shit. I was proud of myself for maintaining my composure in a completely unfamiliar situation. Oh yeah. I learned that you can throw up right into your regulator with no repercussions. The chunks will just purge out the sides. Wish I had known.
I walked over to our new hotel and met the crew at the lobby bar to swap stories of the previous night. They were very impressed that I had made the dive boat. When I put my mind to something, there's very little that will stop me from accomplishment. They were less impressed when I told them about throwing up. I went up to my room and enjoyed the view for a while before taking a nap for a few hours. We did, after all, have to do it all over again that night.
View from my room in Olongopo
We made friends with this cute little 22-year old Philippino who was our waitress at the bar. She was getting off and we invited her to dinner with us, which she obliged. We went to a restaurant within walking distance of the hotel and had an unremarkable meal. The whole time, I was hitting on Rhea, our new friend, and she was eating it up. After dinner was over, about 11, Rhea said she had to get home. We held hands as I walked her back to the hotel and I told the crew that I'd meet up with them at Rascal's. We got back to the hotel and I invited Rhea up to the room. We climbed the 3 flights to my room and were having sex within about 15 minutes. She was a real sport! Very sweet and adventurous. Afterwards, she got dressed and said she REALLY had to get home. I asked what her hurry was and she said she had a 2-year old to get home to. Jesus, I thought. She left and I went and met the crew. They were back at it, pulling that God damned cord every 30 minutes and having those bitches run wild for those fucking ping pong balls. I was exhausted. Rose wouldn't have any of it and was all over me. Angel had the night off. I pushed Rose away and ordered a drink. After my drink, I decided to head back to the hotel. Rose asked me if I wanted her to come over and I did. I told her I'd leave a key for her at the front desk. She showed up about 2:30 and we had sex again. She left around 3:30. I didn't tip her.
One thing I can say about the Philippinos is that they are unequivocally the nicest people on Earth. This is saying a lot for me. I'm from Texas and thought we for sure had the nicest people in the world. Everyone in The Philippines addresses you as sir or ma'am and always have a smile on their faces. They never ask for anything and as much as I felt like I exploited them, I still have a lot of respect for them. We lobbied the next day around noon and nearly everyone that we had met during that leg of the trip met us in the lobby to say goodbye. Almost all of them had some sort of gift to give us. Rhea gave me a keychain and Rose had baked me some pandesal bread, the greatest, sweetest bread you have ever tasted. The other girls that the crew had hooked up with gave them each gifts as well. Jeff gave my flight attendant some roses. It was a really great and touching way to end an awesome trip. We made our way to the airport, prepped the plane and waited for our passengers. We stopped at Guam on the way back to Hawaii for fuel and were in Honolulu 10 hours later.
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